Rob and Melissa Stephenson from Flea Market Flipper talk about overcoming one of their biggest fears.
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How We Overcame One Of Our Biggest Fears
Rob: What's up, Pro Flippers? On today's episode, we are talking about something that was super scary for us and we're going to get into the nitty and gritty how we actually accomplished it and the steps that we took to overcome this fear that we had.
Rob: Alright guys, so on today's episode, we're talking about something we were terrified to do. Somebody reached out to us and asked us to do this. And I want to tell you guys what that was and kind of how we took steps to overcome this fear and actually conquer it.
Which I'm not sure it's conquered, but we took the steps in the right direction. Not quite conquered. Exactly. Steps in the right direction to be able to really do this, and do it well.
Melissa: So if you have some fears, we're kind of talking about that. We're just kind of like what we've been up to so far this summer.
We know the summer has been started and we haven't really had a lot of podcasts go out yet. So, yeah, just kind of talking about that and what we were doing and the big thing that we were scared to do that we just did last week.
Rob: That's it.
Melissa: Was?
Rob: Maybe.
Melissa: Oh, you're not going to say it.
Rob: Not yet, not yet. The fear that you're facing right now, maybe it is starting your flipping business.
Maybe it's selling on eBay because eBay might be intimidating. You might have fear, analysis, paralysis. What are you facing right now that you keep putting on the back burner and you don't do it? What is that?
Melissa: Maybe it's listing that first freight item.
Rob: What is it? What is it? We want to tell you guys, kind of our steps on how we overcame this, how we actually, really looked this in the face and went out and did it.
And hopefully it will help you guys along your journey as well, whatever is terrifying you right now. So, back, another back step on this, I feel if you're not stepping out of your comfort zone, you're not growing. And that was one of the biggest reasons why we decided for this that when somebody asked us to do this, we're like, man, I'm terrified.
I really don't want to do this, but I knew if we still stay where we are, we're not growing. And I always want to be growing. I always want to be learning. Melissa and I are constantly listening to audiobooks. We're constantly listening to podcasts business podcasts how to get better and better at what we do. And I feel like that helps us with our journey, our our journey of moving forward and up. That's what our goal is.
Melissa: But there is a time where you start listening and you're learning and you're like you're gathering all this knowledge, but you're not taking action.
And then that's, that's the next step is doing the thing that might be scary to you and taking the action. So, and we've been good, I feel like at taking action where we're like, we had no idea how to start a podcast. And so like, we're just going to do it and figure it out. And then, people are like, well, you should do video too.
So then we started recording it on video as well. We don't always get them all released, but we're still recording them. So I don't know that you just do it, and then you get better at doing the thing, so.
Rob: And for us, we had a deadline. We had a date that this was going to, which probably helped. Which probably helped.
It did, and maybe that's what, one of the biggest takeaways from this episode is maybe you are struggling right now to do something. Let's set a date on that. You have consequences on that date. What would you absolutely, if this fear is getting in the way and you cannot execute it, let's set a date, whether it's two weeks, a month out, you are going to get this freight item listed.
Whether it, you know, maybe in two weeks you're like, all right, that's the date. I have to have it listed by then. If not, I have to, that's it. I have to do something. Like I got to, I'll write a check to a charity or something like that. Now that might not be a good one, but you know what I mean? Just
Melissa: some people will do that to where they do a thing, like a challenge with themselves, but then they'll write it to an organization that they can't stand.
So if you don't do it, you have to support this organization that you can, not necessarily a charity, but like some, like maybe your other political party or whatever it is that you don't agree with at all. You have to write them a check for a hundred dollars or whatever it is. If you don't do the thing that you say you're going to do, that's a motivator.
Rob: It is.
So for us, we had a date. We had a date that it was, hey, coming, coming, coming, and then it had to be executed. We didn't have an option. It wasn't postponing it. It wasn't like, I don't want to do this. We had to do it. So what are you guys curious of what this was for us? For us, it was speaking on stage.
Somebody asked us to do a presentation on what we absolutely love, what we're passionate about, which is flipping. And they asked us to do it on a stage. And this is not just any stage. It was a stage with 500 people in the audience. And it was engineered more towards kids.
Melissa: It was for whole families though.
So it was the, the parents and all of these parents are in a mastermind with us. So this is a Russell Brunson actually asked us to speak. If you're familiar with any digital marketing, he like has been a guru in that space for a long time. But we are in one of his masterminds and he asked us to speak.
And this is the second time, actually, he's asked us to speak. We spoke two years ago, which was also terrifying. And you think, okay, well you've done this one. So we did have a little, I would say going into it, we weren't as nervous. We were nervous, but we weren't like, I don't know, our confidence was a little bit higher because we had done it once before and because of something we did to prep for this.
And what was that?
Rob: So the steps that we took, the first one is we found somebody who teaches how to speak, how to get better at presentations and we enrolled into his course is what we did. So we actually took a course to learn how to speak better on stage, on videos, all that kind of stuff, and it was one of those things that we had to learn to get better and we found the right person to teach us to get better and we did. We enrolled in it. You guys, we have coaching
Melissa: we have to go and do a different speech every week in front of a couple different people. That's it. On zoom. So.
Rob: And we have coaching programs, but we are just the same when we want to learn something, we're seeking out coaching as well. And that's what we did with this.
And like Melissa said, we had groups that we got in. We learned these things and then we had to execute them in small group sections to see what we were learning and to get better at what we were doing. So.
Melissa: And you might even, sorry, you might even think, okay, well, you guys do videos. It shouldn't be that hard.
It is still terrifying for us to get in front of people and we're different people, obviously, but like for me, I hated talking in front of people so much. In college, it's a requirement. So I went to college, I have my bachelor's, but you have to, you have to do a semester of speaking. The only other option they gave me, I was a science major, the only other option was you could prevent your, present your senior research in front of a big, like in the big auditorium, where So I'm like, for one speech, I don't have to, I can give up a whole semester of doing speeches.
Looking back, I'm like, man, I wish I would have learned how to speak. That would have been really awesome. But I'm like, I can do one science presentation instead of doing speech class. And I did that because I was terrified. I did not want to do any kind of speaking class. And I even remember one of the first events we went to, you're one that you hate to be pulled up on stage.
Like Rob hates, like if they call, you know, you have audience participation. If they call on him, he is always like, What was it? It was an Isagenix event that we went to and they called you up to answer some questions or something and you're like, this is, I hate this so much.
Rob: I did not want to do it.
Absolutely. So, but this is the first thing that we did. We found somebody who is better at what we were doing and we enrolled into his course and we got in there and we got to do that. So, the second thing that we did actually is getting up on stage. Is that the best order? I mean we, we went through it, we went through multiple weeks, what are we, four or five weeks, prior to actually our speaking, engaging, going on stage.
Like I said, we had that deadline, we had
Melissa: the two main things, is we, and you have to do it. We said yes, we're not going to say no. If we say no, then we might never get that opportunity again. So we're like, okay, we gotta, we gotta say yes, we don't have an option. Yeah. And now we have a deadline in a couple months, whatever it was, and then we're like, okay, let's get the tools to do it. So.
Rob: And guess what? All that preparation that we did, we walked out on stage and I forgot my first line right in the first five seconds. I forgot what I was supposed to stay because it's terrifying to me. That is not something that comes natural to me. I'm not like you guys see me in videos.
I'm very animated. You guys, you guys hear me. I'm passionate about what I do.
Melissa: Like one 10th of that on stage.
Rob: At the same time on stage. All that goes away just because, and I don't know why, but it's one of those things that we came out. Okay. And I forgot what I was supposed to say in front of 500 people.
And so, I mean, I recovered within, you know, five seconds. I realized what I was doing and I went back into my lines.
Melissa: We got it. We got it under control.
Rob: We rehearsed for hours upon hours, tens, twenty hours, probably, rehearsing to get this thing right. That's the other thing that we, for preparation, is we rehearsed.
We already know our material, but we tried to go to the next level and really set out. Prepare. Prepare. Set out what we were going to talk about, how we were going to go back and forth and do it. And that's one of the biggest things is we, we did, we, we went into this coaching and then we also prepared, we got our speech ready, and we practiced it.
We practiced it back and forth, back and forth, and back and forth many, many, many times. So it wasn't going to be a surprise to us. The only aspect that we could not prepare for was being in front of 500 people like we were going to be. We had no way of being able to do that.
Melissa: Unless you do it. So you just gotta do it.
Until you do it. Do it scared.
Rob: So, it was our second time on stage. We feel like we did, we delivered a great presentation. We had numbers and numbers of people come up to us afterwards and say, that was an amazing presentation. Thank you so much.
Melissa: It wasn't because of how we presented it. No, definitely not.
No, but we, it was good. It, it was good. The kids were all excited. We got to talk to them about it. And a lot of people were inspired to start. And the reason they asked us to do it is because it was a kid's, a teen entrepreneur event. And so like eBay is a great place to get started and it's a great place to have your own business so it's kind of like a gateway into entrepreneurship and so that's why they asked us to speak. And and it was a lot of fun and and we were so glad when it was over, but but it was something it's like you have this fear how do you get past it? What are the things that you need to do to get past it? And it does help that we had a date so I think setting a date for your thing you is a good idea.
So that's absolutely something definitely to add. And if you are looking to go speaking, the course we took was speak up for by David Dory. So I don't know how often he promotes it, but it was, it was really good. And I would highly recommend it. He's very involved and very like, and now we can go and watch speakers and be like, Oh, they're doing this.
They're doing this. They're doing this. I mean, we still need to get better at doing those things, but we can recognize it. And even before, oh, go ahead.
Rob: Well, the tools that he taught us in this program. You can see when you're watching speakers like we started being more aware of our pastor watching our pastor on Sunday morning and watching him and seeing like, oh, that's a tool that David's teaching us. So many of those things we were picking out even other presenters on stage before us after us, we would watch them and we're like, oh, this is exactly what he was showing us.
This is what good speakers do. So he was giving us the tools to do it. The only thing is we have to get better at it. And I think that comes with repetition. And that's with anything you do. It is. Maybe that's speaking to you right now, that you have to get better at what you're doing, but you can't until you take that first step and then the next step and the next step, you have to continue to do it to get better at it.
Melissa: Yeah. And it was funny. We didn't know going into it, we knew a couple of the speakers, but, there was a surprise guest speaker when we first got there and I don't know if you guys are in the self development world at all but if you're listening to this you probably are a little bit and the first speaker was Trent Shelton. And he's huge in the motivation, amazing motivational speech we had to go like we weren't right after him we're the second one after him. Like how are we supposed to follow him like he's doing all these things he's an amazing speaker he's spoken on every stage imaginable I don't know if you've ever seen him but he's a motivational speaker used to be an NFL player.
Rob: Tons and tons of countries he's speaking in spoken in and he's just amazing, an amazing guy and a great, great speaker.
Melissa: So. He's amazing. So it was crazy. I'm like, oh great. We get to follow him. Okay, let's go. So it was just an extra thing of a little bit nerve wracking, but, but we had to do it. Well, what are you going to do at that point? We're there. It'd be like, sorry guys, we're, we're out. We can't do it. Like you can't do that.
So we just got to do it. And, and I, I do love, do it scared is something that Ruth, Ruth Suckup, who also spoke there, was one of her slogans for one of her programs. Just do it scared. Like, you're just gonna go and it's okay and you'll survive. And that was something I told, one of our people in our mastermind, I don't know, afterwards.
I was like, we didn't die! We did it! It was good! We were, we, we were good. We didn't, collapse on stage, so.
Rob: But we're growing and that's the same thing that you should strive for. You should strive to always be growing, not we've talked about that before. You can't really stay still in this world.
You're either digressing, going backwards, because think of anything, you can either be growing or digressing and we always want to be growing. We always want to be learning. We always want to be getting better at what we're doing, whether that's eBay sales, whether it's, getting better at our business aspect of our business, where our coaching is.
We're always trying to grow in these aspects of our lives because we always want to get better.
Melissa: I mean, we're in, we're in. The mastermind that we're in at, which was what this event was for, was kind of for the kids of the mastermind. What we're in that, because we want to get better at delivering our coaching and being like a better serving our people, better serving our audience, better, reaching more people.
So we want to get better. So that's why we're even involved in this. And it is a sacrifice to be in this. It's a mastermind. It is, you know, it's a sacrifice for us. But it's one that we feel like is totally worth it, cause even just a quick, quick note. This last year in the digital part of our business was really tough.
But if we didn't have the people surrounding us that we had, to be like, okay, well let's switch this or let's do this. Or gave us ideas and encouragement to go forward. Like, It got really tough at one point and I'm like, well, let's just go do this flipping thing and not do anything else and not do it, but we got past that.
So, anyways, but having those people around us, I feel like is so important. So find those people that you need to be around and whatever it is you're trying to learn, get into a community with them. So.
Rob: You guys are awesome. Thank you so much for spending some time with us here today. I cannot wait to see you guys on the next episode.