Rob and Melissa Stephenson from Flea Market Flipper discuss what to do if your spouse doesn’t support your flipping side hustle and some tips to stay positive.
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Reseller Hangout Podcast - Rob & Melissa On Positivity
Rob: Okay. So what do you do if you want to jump into this side hustle and your spouse or significant other says no way?
Melissa: We're going to dive into that plus a little bit more on this episode.
Rob: Okay. So we are going to dive into what to do if your spouse does not want you to start flipping as a side hustle, but we're also going to talk about some other key points in our journey, what helps us be good flippers and just be good at what we're doing.
Melissa: Because there was a time in our story, in our marriage where we didn't always see eye to eye on some ventures. So we're going to talk a little bit about that. And that could be where you are in flipping and we're not giving you marital advice, so take it with a grain of salt, but we do value each other's opinion and we want to be on the same page. Like that's a goal of a marriage is to be on the same page.
And it's hard if your spouse might not be wanting you to do reselling and you really are passionate about it. So that could be a hard spot to be in.
Rob: Yeah, definitely. And we can relate this back to our journey, not necessarily on reselling, but, Melissa started a multi-level marketing company. This was probably what, eight or 10 years ago.
Melissa: Like 14 years ago.
Rob: 14 years ago, she started this, and I was not on board when she did it. I did not want to have anything to do with it. She did it, she worked hard at it, and I saw how hard she was working at it. It drew me to her and I actually started helping her. And it was a supplement company. It's called Isogenix.
It drew me to her because of how hard she was working in trying to make a difference and make income. And like I said, it drew me to her to where I actually started taking the supplements. We still to this day take the supplements. But I started doing that and not only that, I started going to her trainings in some other, they had amazing trainings in this company, that you can apply not to the business, but to anything in life.
Melissa: To any business.
So it's pretty cool. Like we got a lot of training for free. We still can apply to some things that we do today in business. And it was 12, it wasn't 14. It was 12. 12 years ago now.
Rob: Well, in our situation, I just had to see her do it, see her passion, and it caused me to get sucked into it, and to where we started doing it and we, we started doing it together and I wanted to spend time with her.
So I did it. So maybe that's the answer for you. I don't know if it's going to help, but that's what helped us. And I also think about Stacey and John who went on this journey and Stacey's one of our students from the last three, four years. Flipper University. She went through Flipper University, and she tells us that's the same thing that happened to her.
She actually found us on our blog I think it was. So she found us, and then she's like, she talked to John, her husband and said, hey, I really want to start doing this. And he's like, no way, we're not going to do that. So she thought, well, I'm just going to start doing it slow and I'm going to let him see what my results are.
And she got similar results to what Melissa and I had. John started seeing the progress she was making, the money that she was making, and he started coming on and helping her. And, now they, yeah, they do it together and they spend time together and John builds pallets and does all kinds of stuff.
So I don't know that this is the right thing for you, but this is what worked in mine and Melissa's situation and also in Stacey and John's. This is how we kind of handled it.
Melissa: Because results can really speak louder than words, actions speak louder than words, but results really show. If you can, you know, make some extra money and that's what your goal is to, and you really love what you're doing, then they'll start to see that passion.
They'll start to see kind of a change in you. And I do have to add that one of the biggest reasons that I haven't kept pursuing that was because of our Flea Market Flipper brand that we started in 2015. Yeah. So it was like, oh, I can't really do both. They take too much time for both of them. So we had decided to jump all in with Flea Market Flipper back then.
And, that's been an amazing ride. So we're here today.
Rob: But one of the other keys in our journey is listening and trying to surround ourself with positive people, uplifting people, people that are on the same trajectory that we are on. That has been a huge key. If you guys don't know Melissa and I, we take a morning runs.
We actually go out after we get the kids to school, we go out, we take a walk and then do a good two to three mile jog. And then we walk back home. But during this time we're communicating with each other. We're talking about what's going on in the business. And then also when we start running, instead of listening to music, what a lot of people do, what we did as younger kids is
Melissa: We're not old, what are you talking about?
Rob: We would listen to music to motivate us. Well, now we listen to podcasts. We listen to audio books, and these are not just any podcast or audio books. These are uplifting. They get us jazzed for the day. They get us excited for just
Melissa: Opportunity that's out there.
Rob: Exactly!
Melissa: To get excited for the day.
Rob: So, so maybe that's where you're at, also in your journey is you're trying to figure out, okay, how do I go to that next level? How do I level up? Maybe try to seek out some podcasts or some audio books. And not all podcasts are created equal. One of the things is that if you're around negative people, if you're listening to negativity and Lord knows nowadays, you can find negativity anywhere. You can turn on the TV and you're going to hear some negative stuff come out. But the more you're around that, the harder it is to keep your mind positive and focused on positive stuff.
Melissa: Yeah.
It just like seeps in that you just, you don't realize that you're listening to it or, you know, seeing it everywhere, but it is everywhere. It's all over social media, it's all over the news. Like we made a conscious decision.
How long ago?
Rob: At least nine years, eight or nine years ago.
Melissa: A while ago to turn off the news and we haven't had the news or TV in that amount of time. And we don't really, we don't have a desire to turn it on and listen to it. I mean, if something, like you said earlier, when we were talking, if something big and major were to happen, somebody will tell us somehow.
Rob: Somehow it'll get to us. Whether it's Facebook, whether it's, you know, a neighbor, a friend or something, there's some crazy thing that goes on that we have to hear about.
Trust me. We'll definitely know about.
Melissa: It's not good to be plugged into all that stuff all the time, because it is so draining. And then being around, like what you're talking about being around, not positive people. So maybe it's not necessarily like your spouse, maybe you don't have a spouse or it's not your spouse that is, thinking you can't do this, or doesn't think it's a good idea.
Maybe it's your friends and some of your friends or family that think, what are you doing? Like, you're going to start this reselling thing. You're not going to make it, you're going to fail. And it's going to be another failed thing that you did. Well, do you don't need to listen to that. So you need to think about, okay, well, do these people really want me to succeed?
Like I know like family, you can't really, like, you're not trying to distance yourself from family, but you still can kind of keep your own space.
Rob: Yeah. And we're not telling anybody to walk away from their spouse, walk away from their family, not that kind of stuff, but you guys just try to find those those positive people who are going to uplift you, you know.
Melissa: Find your tribe.
Rob: Exactly. Whether it's friends, whether it's podcasts, whether it's books, whatever it is, whatever it is that will get you in the right direction, get your head in the right direction, to where you can move forward and be excited about what you're doing. Having those people around you, I'm telling you it is a game changer.
It is definitely a game changer. What exactly are some takeaways from, you know, this whole discussion is definitely take survey of the people around you. Take survey of maybe the people that are at your work, where you're working, you know, the majority of the day. Are those negative people in there? If they are try to not, I mean, we're not telling you to walk away and never talk to people, but just realize, okay, well, if there's a negative person who's always nagging or who's always, you know, saying this is a bad idea, or that's a bad idea, maybe not talk to them about some of your ideas. Maybe not get that close with that person. Find the people who are going to be uplifting and encourage you.
Melissa: And who are going to say that's an amazing idea, or, you know, give you some feedback and just encourage you to do it. So that's one thing, one of our favorite podcasters, JLD ends his podcast with you're the sum of the five people you spend the most time with.
And you just spent the last half an hour with me and whoever we interviewed. And so, you know, let's go do this. So, you know, just to evaluate kind of who you're around. And try to, if you don't have those people in your life, try to go search for those people who are on the same trajectory, or want to be on the same path as you like, who have those big goals, who want to do those things and not the people who kind of want to stay stuck and let life happen to them. So.
Rob: They're comfortable with where they're at. You guys, if you have the yearning, if you have that desire to get out there, if you're listening to this, hopefully, you know, flipping is what's in your blood. You love going to flea markets and thrift stores and yard sales.
And you have that desire to better your business. Guys, yeah, you just want to try to find some people who are uplifting. And I, like we said, we're not telling anybody to walk away from their spouse, their significant other, their family.
Melissa: Maybe show them what's possible. You know, give them a little results.
Don't take all the extra time and fill up the house with a whole bunch of stuff. And maybe that's what they're nervous about, but maybe, you know, just start small and show them that you can make some extra money and you can do this. And maybe you've had a track record of not making it happen. So like, we're going to encourage you, that you can make it happen.
You can bust through those walls of your own thinking that you can't make this side hustle successful, or you can't turn it into a full-time income eventually. You totally can. If you have that goal, you totally can. And find those people that can help you along the way.
Rob: Absolutely. So, guys, hopefully you've found this podcast, you found it, encouraging, and hopefully it's something that you'd want to share.
If you do, please share this with your friends. We love to be encouraging and we love to give tips and tricks on our journey, for sure. It'll hopefully help people out as well, that are going down the same journey, or, you know, side by side with us. We're so excited to do that for sure.
Melissa: Thank you so much for listening and we have a lot of fun doing these now. So. Thank you.
Rob: Guys, have a great day! We'll talk to you soon.